None of the athletes who compete in the Olympics just “ended up” there.

They didn’t accidentally get good enough to compete.

They didn’t just wish and hope and dream and visualize themselves being there.

And they didn’t listen to their critics.

• like the gymnast whose father told her she was too awkward to do gymnastics.
• or the hockey player whose older brother said he’d always be a loser.
• or the volleyball champion whose well-meaning friends smiled to her face but always talked behind her back about how she wasted so much time on her “hobby.”

What they did do was train as hard as they could…every single day.

They didn’t just decide that they wanted to go to the Olympics, they committed themselves to it. They chose to master their craft. What’s the difference? Deciding is mental; committing is backed up by measurable action – something you can see, count, replicate, and repeat.

I’ve done a lot of research on what makes women successful – specifically in four distinct areas. Their individual characteristics, traits, and beliefs are always a telling sign but that’s really about their potential for success.

The true deciding factor is their behavior. What exactly do they do with all that potential?

The winners act. They step out. They take risks. They do things that are uncomfortable. They challenge themselves…every day. They choose what’s hard over what’s convenient.

Are there other athletes in this country who had the potential to go to the Olympics? Absolutely.

Are there other entrepreneurs with the potential to go to the top? Almost every single one of them. Maybe we’re talking about you.

The deciding factor, however, isn’t how bad you want it or how much belief you have or whether you are task oriented or a people person or whether you live in the right neighborhood or whether you’re single, thin, young, beautiful, smart, willing, deserving, or educated.

The single deciding factor in whether or not you “win the gold” in your business is what you actually do in your business today…and tomorrow…and the next day…and the day after that.

Believe you can do it. Don’t listen to your critics (they haven’t done it either!) and take the biggest, boldest, most outrageous action step you can think of today. Then
repeat
repeat
repeat!!!

Be bold!
Ann

Wake up, brush teeth, get dressed, eat breakfast, go to work, run errands, take care of the kids, pay bills, go to bed.

Is that all there is?

For many, yes it is. They feel trapped in a life that is entirely unrecognizable from the one they dreamed of as a kid. Each day looks like the one before and it almost feels…too late.

Something more

Sunrise on the beach is one of my all-time favorite experiences. It represents hope and optimism and the promise of a new day where I have the opportunity to make a difference.

It’s a daily “do over.” A chance to reassess what we have been given, to be grateful for the gift of another day, and to renew our commitment to our purpose, values, and mission.

As much as I drink in each sunrise – standing in the surf talking with God and very often listening to Third Day (“their “Revelation” album is my latest favorite) – I am also aware that I will only have a finite number of sunrises.

How I choose to spend the 1,440 minutes after each one is entirely up to me.

I can waste it away being caught up in the minutia of life, wrapped up in the “me” of my day, whining, sniveling, and feeling put upon or I can step out with courage to face my fears, insecurities, doubts, self-talk, and critics.

Only one of those choices makes a difference in the lives of those who need what I was created to give.

Make an impact

You are here for a purpose and you were given spiritual gifts and talents specific to that mission.

Whether you choose to use them or not is up to you, but don’t kid yourself that you are not equipped or ready or even worthy for that matter. You most definitely are.

You have already been given everything you need to achieve greatness.

You are blessed with distinct spiritual gifts whose unique combination allows you to make a difference and an impact while you’re here. Only when you use those gifts – when you show up in a bold way – will you transcend your daily existence.

Maybe you make a difference when you speak, write, garden, parent, paint, nurture, quilt, volunteer, teach, coach, talk to strangers, preach, cook, plan, crunch numbers, or pay a visit.

Maybe you do it for a living or maybe you infuse your entire day with it, but it is how you uplevel everything and everyone around you.

You were not created to merely endure your life – you were meant to do something that brings others joy.

Whatever it is, go do it.
And be your absolute, very best at it.
Give it your all because the world is waiting for you.
Fall down, make lots of mistakes, dare to risk looking like a fool, and don’t let anyone take away a future you are destined to fulfill. Guard your gifts and dreams like they were your own children.

Don’t follow the money – follow your gifts. Be exactly who you were designed to be. Anything less would be such a loss.

Be bold!
- Ann
P. S. Jumpstart your thinking with my free 7-day “Take Back Your Life!” video course!
P. P. S. Yes, I took the sunrise picture

Choice gives you power. And you get to choose everything about your future.

Too many people will never take that step – never acknowledge that they are the architects of their life and their business. It’s too easy to blame someone or something else for their apparent inability to become a success.

Successful people aren’t that way by accident. They didn’t just happen to fall into it. They chose it. Strategically.

The only thing standing between you and that audacious dream of yours was your willingness to choose, so you can stop all the complaining and sobbing and hanging on to your story about why it’s all just so difficult. Get on with the business of being successful.

Successful people are not the ones telling you how hard it is, are they?

The ones telling you it can’t be done are those who aren’t doing it. They are attached to their identity as a person who struggles, who carries on in the face of insurmountable odds, who take on too much and crumple under the pressure because they are addicted to the attention they get for the struggle.

Choose today, right now, to let all that go.

Choose to stop seeking credit for all you’ve been through and start seeking the personal satisfaction that only comes with accomplishment.

Choose to stop wallowing in your need to be validated for your suffering.

Choose to release your white-knuckled grip on your need for sympathy and validation from other people and start doing the things successful people do.

They choose a goal (how much, by when).
They determine what it will take to reach that goal.
Then they go do that.

They do not wait for permission.
They do not look for affirmation from others.
They don’t waste their time allowing drama to infect their life.
And they do not seek credit for trying.

You can be enormously, abundantly successful or you can be a martyr. You can’t be both.

Choose your success!
- Ann
P.S. Want a daily dose of motivation? Check out The Confidence Club at
http://AnnVertel.com/shop/confidence-club/

January 4, 2011

Welcome to the new year. Have you piled on a few more tasks, ideas, commitments, and resolutions? Most people think of the start of the new year as a means to do more. Although their intentions are good, after a few weeks they’re usually exhausted and return to what they’ve always done.

So, I challenge you to try something different this year.

Instead of saying “yes” to more things, try saying “no.” By cutting out the distractions, time wasters, tolerations, and the plethora of mediocrity you find yourself drowning in day after day, you might stand a chance of producing something significant.

For example, one of my habits as an entrepreneur is to study and follow other entrepreneurs. This, as you can imagine, can be a tremendous time expense. I could literally spend hours consuming information about other people – getting more ideas and implementing none.

So I am choosing just five – five that I like, trust, and respect – five whose newsletters and blog posts cause me to play a bigger game – and I will only follow them. I am letting go of all the rest, the ones I have followed because I’ve been afraid I might “miss something.” This is enormously challenging (scary!) for me but it’s time to say no.

When you deliberately say no to the areas of your life that are not productive, you open yourself up to opportunities that might be otherwise be missed.

Say no to anything that does not actually produce a profit or move you toward a targeted goal. This includes T.V. (seriously, can you name 5 shows you’ve seen in your lifetime that have contributed to your success?), celebrity magazines, gossip, having your email open all the time, and spending more than 30 minutes on Twitter or Facebook.

Say no to toxic people – you know who they are – they suck the life out of your time, confidence, and dreams. Just stop talking to them. If that’s absolutely not possible then stop talking to them about anything to do with your dreams. And put a time limit on the amount of time you’ll listen to their negativity (like 5 minutes, tops) before you say, “thank you for calling” or “I’ve enjoyed our brief chat” or  if you’re feeling especially assertive, “I know we’ve talked at length about these kinds of things in the past, but to be honest, I really need to focus on something more positive. ”

Say no to food that does not give you sustainable energy for your big dream. Enough said.

Say no to spending money in order to feel good.

And say no to anyone or anything that threatens to take away your desire to live a life of excellence!
- Ann

The glass ceiling – you’ve heard the term before. It refers to the invisible limit placed on women in the corporate world. Given the political structure and the nature of power struggles, territoriality, and primal instincts that bleed into the corporate world, a woman’s rise to a level commensurate with her worth has often been a long fought battle that may never be won.

But you’re not in the corporate world. Halleluiah, there’s no glass ceiling!

Or is there?

If you run your own business, no one from your company has ever told you, “sorry, but that’s your limit. You’re not allowed to make any more than that.”

Never. Not once.

Or have they…..?

The message you should be receiving from “headquarters” is, “go ahead, make all the money you want” because you don’t have a glass ceiling salary. The only one that exists is in your head.

Time and again I meet women who have given themselves their own glass ceiling. They limit their earning potential by assuming that they couldn’t possibly deserve to be wealthy.

They falsely assume that to be wealthy you must be highly educated, or have trained for years in a profession, or risen slowly through the ranks, or paid their dues, or know someone powerful, or be born into it, or marry into it, or invented a cure for some disease, or have an MBA, or somehow have done something amazing in order to deserve the right to be wealthy.

In fact, if you don’t learn another thing about your business, know that you can become enormously wealthy just by sharing your product, service, or knowledge and asking, “how can I serve you better?”

It’s that simple.

Really.

Don’t make it harder than it is. It doesn’t have to hurt and you don’t have to pay years and years of dues. You have the right to be wealthy so stop behaving like your life is a dress rehearsal.

If you justify an earning limit for yourself or rationalize why you can’t exceed it, you have created your own glass ceiling effect. The simple fact is that you are not limited to any number.

There is no limit, no ceiling, no point at which someone is going to tap you on the shoulder and say, “just who do you think you are? You don’t deserve to have an unlimited income, now give it all back. ”

You’ve reached adulthood and now – unlike most of the women in the world – have an uncredible opportunity to change your life and the lives of your family. Don’t squander it.

If you continue to behave as if there is a limit, invisible or not, you will not reach your potential and you will doom yourself to accepting something lower than you deserve.

Choose today to stop waiting for someone else to promote you, give you the keys to the corner office, give you a transfer to a more prestigious position, or give you permission to out-earn the CEO – you have the power to do all that, you just have to say, “yes.”

Now quit mucking around and go be a millionaire!
- Ann

I remember the first time I was allowed to go out trick-or-treating on Halloween night with just my friends. I’m pretty sure my Dad was following at a safe distance but he’ll neither confirm nor deny that accusation!

Our trick-or-treat mission had a singular, laser-like focus – get as much candy as possible in the shortest amount of time. The goal? A big plastic orange pumpkin overflowing with goodies.

We ran from house to house, scouring the neighborhood intent upon our goal. On occasion, we approached a house, rang the bell, and nothing happened. The lights were on but no one answered the door.

Put in that situation, what do most kids do?

They move on to the next house. “Come on, let’s go” and they’re headed down the block.

They don’t stop for a second to wonder why the owners didn’t answer the door.
They don’t take it personally.
They don’t think that they’re wearing the wrong costume.
They don’t walk around the house peering in the window trying to see why the owners didn’t answer the doorbell.
They don’t sit down on the front step and pout.
And they certainly don’t decide to quit and go home.

As we grow up, our self-esteem takes a few hits and we start to think that everything that happens to us is about us. It’s not. Nine times out of ten, when you hear something that feels like rejection, it’s not about you, it’s about the other person.

If you can separate yourself from any negative response you receive from others, you’re half way home to getting to your goal.

Whatever goals you have set for yourself – eating healthy, doubling your income, communicating better with your kids, – know that they are valid and worth the effort. When someone comes along to throw you off track, sabatoge your efforts, or deny your ability to get it done, recognize their comments for what they are – a house with no candy.

Remember your mission. Refocus on your goal. Then run to the next house.

That’s where the candy is.

Your goal is a full plastic pumpkin, and you don’t care which houses or how many houses it takes to make that happen.
Be bold!
Ann

When I was in college, I joined a sorority. We had rules and guidelines, much like any organized group. One of those guidelines was that we were all to believe in the concept of sisterly love. It sounded good, but in reality I became disillusioned after watching so many of my sisters talk behind others’ backs, lie, and pretend to like each other.

It took me a long time to realize that I did not need to settle for surrounding myself with whoever just happened to be in my life. I could actually choose the people in my life. And I wanted to choose wisely.

Every one of my friends, clients, and business associates are individuals that I like, trust, and respect. By choice.

Don’t get me wrong, I have had lots of people in my life who were lacking one, two, or even all three or those very foundational elements (I plead temporary insanity!) Friends I thought were “cool” but would sell me down the river for a nickel. Or friends who were nice to my face, but bad-mouthed me behind my back. And friends whose lifestyle and values were not ones I could respect.

It’s only been in the last few years that I decided I wanted to expect more from the most important people in my life. And you should too.

My friends are people I like so much that I literally smile when they call or pop in on Skype or show up on my doorstep.

I trust them with my daughter and know that her interaction with them not only enhances her life, but makes her stronger by her association with them.

And I respect my friends so much, and the values that they live every day, that I continue to seek their advice and learn from their examples – the way they gracefully and maturely handle challenging circumstances, toxic people, daily frustrations, mistakes, crises, family, love, critics, business, and growing older.

One of the reasons our lives become so complicated is that we allow other people into our lives who don’t match our values.

Take out a piece of paper right now and list all of your personal family and friends, and professional associates who have all three of these qualities – you like them, you trust them, and you respect them.

Then list those people who don’t.

You have a choice. Whenever possible, surround yourself (and your family too!) with only those people you like, trust, and respect. If one of those elements is missing, why on earth would you want them in your in your life?
Be bold!
- Ann

What are the odds that you have been sitting on a fantastic idea for quite some time now? I’d say they’re pretty good. You’ve been in this world for awhile and you’ve likely figured out how to do something better or faster. Or you’ve looked all over for something you’d like to have that just doesn’t exist. And you’ve thought to yourself, “I could do that.” And that’s where it stops.

It doesn’t have to be some life changing idea or something destined to win an award. Better mousetraps are usually conjured up by the very people who’d like to use them. Maybe it’s something that would only help a dozen people. Maybe it’s just for your community. Or maybe it’s something that will catch on like wildfire, but you just can’t see past that very first step.

You don’t need any more time to think about this great idea. It’s likely already fully formed, you’re just waiting on some lighting bolt to show you how to bring it to life. In the meantime your idea, left to its own devices, just sits there, fading, languishing, festering. At some point, it becomes obsolete or you become too used to the inertia that it never gets born.

And that would be tragic.

How much longer are you going to allow yourself to just think about it? And think about it? And think about it some more?

What if you did just one thing to bring that idea into fruition today? Maybe you investigate manufacturers or have a prototype built by the end of the month. Maybe you make just one phone call a day for this entire week, pulling the thread to see what’s next. Maybe you start writing – don’t finish, just start. Somewhere. In the middle. And you make a big mess of it but at least you have begun.

Take the first step.

If you’re waiting for guarantees – instant success, no pain, financial reward, easy development – I’m afraid they don’t exist. And that’s what keeps most people from taking that first, tentative, scary step.

Will it be a success? Maybe. It will definitely be a total, utter, and complete failure….if you do nothing. Sure, you don’t have to run the risk of being publicly embarassed but even with egg on your face, skinned knees, and blisters on your hands you’re a far more successful sight than somewho who chose to stay home from the game.

Good heavens, one of my big ideas is to write a book – really big one – about all the failures I’ve had! All the things I started that crashed and burned. All the times I took a risk and feel flat on my face. All the money I’ve lost, the embarassment I’ve faced, the complete and utter and abject disappointment I have experienced. I could write a whole chapter on the days I felt like the biggest loser on the planet. It should be a hit among others who have taken years to become an “overnight success.”

The idea comes to us quickly. We expect the “how to make it happen” part will be just as simple. That’s where people get stuck.

Here’s how it works. Take the first step. You will feel a shift in your energy. Then take the next step. By the time you take the third step, you will have momentum. You don’t have to do it all at once, just keep doing the next thing.

The time is now. The day to take that first awkward, uncomfortable step is today. Your amazing idea for a product, event, book, radio show, charity, software, process, or system is ripe and the world couldn’t be more ready to receive it. Plant this incredible idea of yours and let it take root.

Now stop messing around and go after your dreams!
- Ann

As the cooler weather sets in, a certain woman thinks she can just show up in my office and wreck havoc in my business. She comes dressed in sloppy clothes, wearing nothing more than moisturizer and lip balm on her face. Her hair looks, well, you can only imagine. And she hates me.

She makes me think it’s ok to be mediocre. She likes to be warm and cozy so she wears sweatpants and baggy tops. Sometimes she even wears her slippers. If she only did this on Saturday, I could let it slide, but she has shown up in my office like this on work days and still has the nerve to call herself a businesswoman. Dressing in this “whatever” way makes her think that way too, and that’s when she becomes downright dangerous.

Sometimes this woman is so stealthy I don’t even notice that she is here. But she leaves clues of her creepy presence – my purse starts to look like my kitchen junk drawer and the top of my desk gets less and less visible.

This woman is…me. The worst version of me.

The phrase “get out of your own way” applies here, and yet I had never stopped to personify this nebulous concept. Seeing a photo of myself on one of those days gave me a clear picture of who I’m up against and it scares me because I know she can bring me down faster than a 1970′s love song. I have hung that photo above my computer like a Wanted: Dead or Alive poster.

Don’t let a similar woman show up in your office. Don’t let her hijack your business and take it on a merry ride through average-ville. She does NOT want you to reach higher because that would mean she’d have to actually exert some effort and she’ll do anything to avoid that, including destroying your business in the process.

Be the best business “you” you know how to be and do that every day. Do it because you take your business seriously, not casually. Yes, working from home can lull you into thinking that it’s ok to play not-to-lose but why give in to that? Play to win! Dress as if you were about to meet an important potential client (you’re more likely to do so and you’ll sound more confident on the phone). Straighten up your desk. And for goodness sake, clean out your purse!
- Ann

Remember the last time you watched a baby learning to crawl or a toddler learning to walk? Or kids at a playground playing on new equipment? They are not just willing but anxious to explore anything new. They follow the lead of other kids, try new tricks, and genuinely challenge themselves to do more, be more, and learn more. That’s because kids operate outside their comfort zone all the time.

Webster’s Ninth New Collegiate Dictionary defines the word “comfortable” as: free from stress or tension; free from vexation or doubts.

It defines the word “uncomfortable” as: causing discomfort or annoyance; feeling discomfort; feeling uneasy.

The Merriam-Webster Unabridged Dictionary defines the term “comfort zone” as: the level at which one functions with ease and familiarity.

We can infer, then, that operating in an “un-comfort” zone would be the level at which we function with dis-ease and unfamiliarity. That means our actions and our behaviors will feel awkward, foreign, clumsy, and inept. Each time we “step out” we’re going to feel like a child learning to walk.

My daughter and I talk about this all the time – that the first time you attempt something, no matter what it is, will always feel strange and scary. She has come to know that the first time is always the most difficult and that things get easier after that, so just making it through the first attempt is a triumph to be celebrated. You don’t have to be “good” at something the first time, you just have to get through it.

If you are doing that every single day – doing something new and unfamiliar – your success will likely come very quickly.

Do those feelings ever go away? Yes, and no. If you operate in an un-comfort zone long enough it begins to feel comfortable. You expand the borders of what feels safe. Successful people just keep expanding the limits of what feels uncomfortable. As your actions, behaviors, tasks, and systems begin to feel under your control, step out into a new one. Keep the cycle of risk-taking active and alive.

The only time you or your business will truly grow is when you are taking risks. If your desire is to be enormously successful, get “comfortable” with operating in your un-comfort zone.

Be bold!
Ann Vertel
P.S. I’d love to hear your thoughts on this…please leave me a comment below!

P.P.S. Want a daily dose of motivation? Check out The Confidence Club at
http://AnnVertel.com/shop/confidence-club/

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